How many of you have forgotten dreams? How many of you still dream but can’t seem to get out of procrastination mode? How many of you marinate in negative self talk? How many of you are fearful to step out of your comfort zone? How many of you desire desperately to pursue your dream but don’t know how to get started?
And how many of you are simply unhappy and can feel a bitter root expanding inside of you?
I was there. When I emerged on this journey, I was the “dreamer who was fearful to step out of her comfort zone”. And I was becoming more and more bitter day by day. I had a conflicting hazy proposition for my life in the spine of my brain, and it seemed to surface in less distracted moments when I had time to clear my mind. I would suddenly remember when I was in church service. Or it would surface in a conversation with a friend. Sometimes it would come up when I was engaged in a good book. Other times it would appear in an actual dream.
2017 brought me a Spiritual Awakening!
One thing I have cultured these past several months is that I truly have all the power to change my life; I just have to intentionally choose to do it. I could either be accountable or I could choose to be the victim. I unfortunately, like most of you, began this journey by choosing a “victim” perspective. I blamed others for my unhappiness. I complained about everything around me. And I felt sorry for myself. Does this sound familiar to you? It sounds something like this, “If only my boss would understand that I am late often because I have a family at home to take care of.” “If only my co-workers would stop being ‘know it alls’ then maybe we would all have a fair chance around here.” “If only my lead would notice the great work I do every day, then maybe I would get promoted.” “If my Supervisor was not such a micro-manager, then maybe I could provide better customer service.”
Here is the truth . . .
“When you blame others, you give up your power for change.” Dr. Robert Anthony
We actually have to be accountable for our life and our future. No one else is going to be accountable on behalf of us. Accountability starts by acknowledging your short comings and taking action towards your well being. It’s understanding that you can only control yourself and not others. For example, if you know that you need to go home at 5:00 every day because you have a commitment at home to cook dinner at 6:00 p.m; and this is very important to you and your values, then you create a “non-negotiable”, and you communicate this in advance to your boss and co-workers. You make them aware that this is an essential part of your well being. Most of the time, they will respect that and not get on your case about it. More often, you have created the drama in your head that “it is not okay” and therefore, you over exert yourself. In the case where they are actually not okay with it, then it is up to you to continue to have a conversation with your manager to influence them to understand what makes you tick. If it causes a hardship on the company, then YOU help find solutions to close the gap, or YOU make the conscious decision to move to another department or choose to move to another job. It’s that simple. There are millions of choices out there for YOU to make. YOU HAVE TO TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR OWN LIFE. Instead of crying about it and blaming others, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. YOU are responsible for your own happiness. And if YOU want results, then you have to be accountable. I know, I was a cryer too!
“Accountability is the glue that ties commitment to the result.” Bob Proctor
I recently spoke on a Christian Radio Talk Show called “LNF Radio”, BIG THANKS to Vanessa Russell, Founder and Executive Director of Love Never Fails, an anti-Human Trafficking Faith Based organization that fights to protect, educate and restore those who are victims and/or at risk of being exploited sexually. This beautiful woman of God knows how to pick a needle out of a haystack and make that one person feel exceptionally important. And that is precisely what she did with me when she invited me to speak on her show. She not only blessed me personally, but she blessed my family and friends because they too felt that they were connected to someone important in their lives.
Now God has given this woman a gift to LOVE ON others right where she is. Vanessa is an accomplished Senior Leader at a Silicon Valley high tech company, Founder and Director of a non-profit organization, hosts 2 radio shows (one is called equally yoked with her husband), is a wife of a Senior Pastor, mother of seven children, and manages to mentor other woman who God puts on her path. Exhausted yet? She is one of the most Accountable women I know. She has a dream, and she is living and breathing it, making it come true, all while continuing to work in the corporate world for the sake of providing for the vision and purpose of her home. She is one busy lady, yet she is present and in control of her happiness, her outlook on life and knows where she is going. Do you think she sacrifices her service to the community? Not one bit. She is in tune with what God wants from her and she aligns with Him and her Husband daily. She has showed me that the “sky is the limit”. I am so grateful God has place her in my life. THAT is exactly what God does, when he is calling you to something greater. He will position people in your path to help mentor you along the way.
The American Society of Training and Development conducted a study on Accountability and found the following as it pertains to achieving your goals:
- If a person has an idea, the probability of them achieving their goal is 10%
- If a person consciously decides to adopt the idea, it is 25%
- If a person decides that they will do it, it is 40%
- If a person adds planning to the mix, it is 50%
- If a person talks to someone else about their commitment, it is 60%
- If a person has a specific accountability partner invested in them, it is 95%
Now if you choose to ignore your dreams and ignore the calling placed on your life, then your core will cry out at some point. You see, God created you with an un-fulfilled crevice in your heart on purpose, and the only thing that could fill that hole is God. When you find God operating in your life, He will call and transition you right into your purpose.
In the gospel of Luke when Jesus was coming to Jerusalem he stopped at the Mount of Olives and the crowd of disciples where worshipping Him and crying out His name; acknowledging He was their king. Some nearby Pharisees looked at Jesus and told him to “rebuke His disciples”. Jesus responded by telling the Pharisees that “if He silenced them, the rocks will cry out.” Reading that scripture was the turning point in my life — I realized at that time that the health problems surfacing was my “rocks crying out”. It was the way in which my innate being was fighting for me to make a change. So if you are experiencing mental health, anxiety, or depression issues, don’t write yourself off just yet — it could be your rocks crying out!
And so my friends, as I wrestled with myself these past 12 months to figure out how to transition into something new, how to experience spiritual growth, how to pursue my purpose and survive, how to experience freedom from the world, and how to give myself permission to rest, re-set and focus, I learned that one of my gifts in life is to help people solve their problems and to relieve them from their pain and suffering. He gifted me with experience and a talent to teach. I did not learn that through being busy and distracted; I learned that from being still, rested and focused.
My gift is to motivate, encourage, strategize, reach, execute and achieve. I have a gift of compassion and a gift of prophesy within me that God is igniting. He has placed people in my life at this very moment whom I am coaching to emerge in freedom. My calling is to be someone’s Mentor, Accountable Partner and Life Coach. Whoever He decides to place in front of me.
If you have answered YES to any of the questions at the beginning of this blog, and you have encountered a transition in your life, or you feel that your rocks too are calling out, then find an accountable partner who is not too busy and who will take the time to invest in you. YOU want to make sure that your goal is 95% achievable, NOT 10%, NOT 40%, NOT even 60% — that is NOT enough! Life is too short to be unhappy and YOU are too precious and valuable to waste the gifts and talents God gave you. When God sent out His disciples, He always sent them out in two. He did not intend for you to serve Him alone.
If you can’t identify an accountable partner who is not too busy or distracted then please reach out to me.
You can contact me on this blog, email me at email@example.com or follow me on Facebook.com/souljen4u. I function with integrity and compassion; I keep your interest in the forefront; I will be your advocate and I don’t pretend like I know it all. I will teach you how to seek God in prayer and fellowship for discernment of your future. And I will remind those who have fixed mindsets how uniquely gifted they are. I will coach you along the way of LIFE!
Want to hear more about my journey?
Listen to me on kfax.com at Love Never Fails Radio at the link below:
Will you hold my hand and make a choice to be accountable to your dream today?